Lost.

I have not written in awhile.  I apologize for not giving you day by day updates on my life.  To be honest though... I have felt completely lost.  I did not know what to say or do or to think or what was going on in my heart.

As I sat and thought today I thought about my life and the lives of my dear friends I found something rather interesting about each of our lives.  I found that each of us have been lost in one way or another when it comes to a "significant other".  

Some finding their hope in someone they loved so dearly. 

Then turning and truly discovering what hope is and the best place to find it.

Some finding joy and who they are in someone that is not always consistent.

Then turning and seeking the face of the One who will bring the best kind of joy and discovering who they are in Him.

Some finding comfort in someone that is so familiar in their life.

Then turning their eyes onto not what is comfortable but rather uncomfortable. Surrendering comfort for a life that maybe is not so familiar and discovering how much strength they have when their eyes are fixed upon the one who has all power and strength.

Some building walls upon walls to protect what is so precious to them... never wanting to be hurt again.

Then turning their head to the One God who will not forsake them.  Breaking the walls and discovering a new kind of Love.

I find this encouraging.  I find this beautiful.  I find it amazing.

I have been crooked and lost this entire week.

Lost in lust.

Lost in the world that I so much despise.

Crooked in confusion.

Loss of words.

Crooked in being WAY out of my comfort zone.

This past week I have been a crooked and lost soul trying to find my way back home.  I am still slightly crooked and still somewhat lost.  However, I find hope in the one that has discovered what hope is and what it truly means.  I have found joy in the one who now finds it in the Lord.  I have found strength in the one whose strength in the Lord seizes to amaze me each day.  I have found freedom in a new kind of Love.

I still feel lost.  But have been inspired in hope, joy and strength by the ones who I hold closest to my heart... and for that I thank you.

Luke 3:5 "Every valley shall be filled in, every mountain and hill made low.  The crooked roads shall become straight, the rough ways smooth."

Signing out: Soon to be found.